Wednesday, May 31, 2006

Ok, so this has been doing the rounds for a wee while, and you must have had your eyes closed to miss it, but just in case you really are a myopic dweeb (or just in case you've been on holiday), here is the reason not to carry out some fraudulent scam on eBay and expect to get away with it.

Sunday, May 21, 2006

Well, they did it. They actually did it. For those of you not in the know, the Eurovision Song Contest has been running since 1956 and have spawned such successes as Abba, Bucks Fizz and Brotherhood of Man. Most of the entries each year are pretty cheesey, which is why I generally don't tune in when it's on, but this year I was rooting for Finland's entry, "Hardrock Hallelujah" by rock band Lordi.
That make up ... if Klingons new about rock music, that's how they'd do it. Yep.

Friday, May 05, 2006


Thanks to John Scalzi for this link …

37 cover versions of Led Zeppelin’s Stairway to Heaven.

Ohdearohdearohdear …

My dad is 65 in a few days.  He finished working last night (although he’s not officially retired until 9th May, he had 3 days holiday to take).  As you can tell, it’s quite a special birthday and so I would like to get him a special birthday gift (plus a little retirement gift).  But, what do you get a 65 year old man who’s had everything he ever wanted for previous birthday gifts?  Answers on a postcard to:

Mrs Clueless
Somewhere in the Frozen North
United Kingdom

On a brighter note, I was offered some work a month and a half back by one of the local civic centres.  They asked me if I would be interested in “doing a bit of consultancy work” for them.  Well, that could mean anything, right?  So I arranged a meeting with them and soon discovered that what they wanted me to do was to teach people with learning disabilities how to make, wrap and sell soap, with the intention that it would become a profitable business and these people would eventually be able to draw a wage and stop claiming disability/incapacity benefit.  My initial contract was for 6 weeks but they’ve extended it by another 6.

I wasn’t sure exactly what these people would be like, but after working with them for a month and a half I am having some serious misgivings about this project.  There are so many aspects of a soapmaking business that they simply are not capable of handling.  Somebody is going to have to take care of all the legal aspects of it, such as compliance with cosmetic regulations (you soapers in the USA don’t know how lucky you are), trading standards requirements such as weights & measures and labelling, public liability, record keeping and batch numbers, bookkeeping … the list goes on.

Apart from all of that, I worked out that they would have to produce (and sell) between 700 and 800 bars of soap per week to make it a viable project.  Last Tuesday they had a particularly productive day – they made a grand total of 18 bars of soap.  These people have very short attention spans, they need a stick of dynamite up their arse to get them to put on any burst of speed, and they get bored very easily.  I teach them one day a week and even that is challenging for them.  If you try to get them to hurry up to increase productivity they get upset and start to cry. They really do need to be treated with kid gloves sometimes. Their project is doomed to failure before it’s even started and I’m beginning to feel very disheartened.  However, if we were to carry on one day a week and use it as a craft day, then I’m all for it.  It’s educational and they enjoy themselves immensely. One girl asked me who would teach them after I had finished.  I told her, “No one, because by then you will be experts and will be able to do it on your own”, to which she replied, with big sad eyes, “Then I don’t want to do it anymore.  I only ever want to make soap with you.”

Awwwwwww.

Thanks to Butchieboy for reminding me …
… so here goes.

Some of you who been reading my blog for a while may remember this and this.  We thought that after the court case that would have been it.  Finished.  But we were wrong.

Back in March we received a letter from his solicitor regarding the incident that that the f*****t was claiming for damages and personal injury.  I mean now the whole thing is getting stupid. It’s become completely obviously that he was never interested in justice and possibly even the welfare of his son, but in his bank balance.  Now it makes sense – the whole way he overreacted from the start, the fact he didn’t want to listen to anybody in case they actually talked some sense, the fact he didn’t even try to find out what happened before passing his own judgement (in fact, he still doesn’t know the full story so his conclusion is based entirely on assumption) … he’s so transparent and he’s making himself look very foolish. Even our solicitor said, “Oh for goodness sake!  He’s just after money. His solicitor is the kind that gives our profession a bad name.”  That kind of person disgusts me.  Anyone who will attempt to screw over somebody else just to make a quick buck is amoral, greedy and selfish, they have no respect for anybody else and they certainly can’t have any for themselves.  I suppose I should be thankful that if he wins, the money will be awarded to his son (who will get it when he’s 18), not to him. I don’t want him to get a penny. He deserves nothing from me but a big fat kick up the arse.  Or maybe a lobotomy.

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